text messages 1441-1470

1441. If you keep doing what you have always done, you will always get what you always got. So, when you want something you’ve never had, you’ve got to do something you’ve never done.

1442. Happiness is learning to appreciate every little blessings and finding the positive lessons in every hurt and failure. Have a nice day ahead!

1443. In 1998, government doctors distributed condoms to Igorots in the Mountain Province for birth control. Kahapon lang, sumulat ang isa, 'Pwede na bang tanggalin?!'

1444. Thought of the day: Do not let what you cannot do interfere with what you can do. Have a nice day!

1445. I love the way it rubs against the soft pink flesh creating a creamy foamy liquid, as it thrust in and out, up and down, can't wait till next time. I love my toothbrush!

1446. Totoo ba ang balitang MALIBOG ka? as in.. Mabait Attractive Loving Intelligent Behaved Openminded Good-looking? Atin lang ito ha. 'Malibog' din ako!

1447. God's love is a candle in the dark. No matter how gloomy our life may be, just one little touch of His love is enough to bring warmth and light. God bless.

1448. Life has its own way of making us smile. Even when you wanna give up and lose hope. Because certain surprises come your way just when you thought you would never smile again. Good morning!

1449. Boy1: Tol, nakipagbreak ang girlfriend ko. Ipinadala pa sa akin ang pictures nila ng bagong boyfriend nya sa motel. Boy2: Anong ginawa mo? Boy1: Ipinadala ko sa tatay nya yung pictures nila. Balibag yun mamaya!

1450. Ano ang tawag sa hipon na madalas madisgrasya? Eh di, accident prawn! Ano ang tawag sa mabilis sa pagkain? Fast food! Sa mas mabilis? Fasta! E ang pinakamabilis? Sofas!

1451. When I first saw your eyes, the shape of your lips, the way you smile, the color of your teeth and the figure of your body, I found out that a famous saying is really true! Nobody's perfect! Hehehe.

1452. They say the world will end soon. They may be right but they could also be wrong. But whatever fate the world may have, I won't allow it to end without telling you, 'I'm glad you came along.'

1453. Prayers are very powerful. The devil smiles when we are weak, he laughs when we are too busy, he giggles when we are afraid but he trembles when we pray. So, pray always!

1454. Other people's opinion of you does not have to become your reality. Those who follow the crowd usually get lost in it. I don't know the key to success, but one key to failure is to please everyone. So why waste your time thinking about what others will tell you? Instead, do what makes you and God happy. Good morning!

1455. Boy: Sunduin kita mamaya, bubusina na lang ako kapag nasa harap na ako ng bahay nyo. Girl: Ok, sige. Anong dala mong sasakyan? Boy: Wala, busina lang! =)

1456. The one good thing about not seeing you is that I can write you letters but the loneliness, the pain of missing you kills me. How I wanted to be with you till my last breath.

1457. In my dreams you gave me your heart. In my dreams we were never apart. In my dreams you kept me close. In my dreams you loved me the most. In my dreams we're always together... might as well be dreaming forever...

1458. The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow. Do good anyway. If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies, succeed anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of being selfish and having ulterior motives, be kind anyway. What you spend years building, someone may destroy overnight, build anyway. If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you, be honest and frank anyway. Give the world the best you have, it may never be enough, give the world the best you have anyway. If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous, be happy anyway. You see, in the final analysis, it's between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway. Good morning!

1459. GF ni kukote ito. Pwede bang tigilan mo na ang pagtetext sa BF ko?! Dahil sa ganyan, napapabayaan na nya ang pag-aartista nya! Fan ka ba nya? Ha? =)

1460. Girl about to be married: Dad, I'm so sad to be leaving Mom! Dad: I understand. Don't let me stand in the of your happiness. Plaease, take your Mom with you!

1461. 5 Fingers Of Prayer: 1) Your thumb is nearer to you, so pray for those who are closest to you. 2) Pointing finger: Pray for those who teach, instruct and heal. 3) Tallest finger: Pray for our leaders, they need God's guidance. 4) Ring finger: Weakest finger, so pray for those who are weak, troubled or in pain. 5) Little finger: the smallest - to remind you to pray for yourself. Please forward and share to people you care about.

1462. God gave us 86,400 valuable seconds each day. May I use a few seconds to say thanks for giving me the gift of knowing someone like you.

1463. Someone asked me why I hold on to him, I smiled. What made me care for him, I stayed silent. They asked why of all people I chose him, I said, 'In a world of lies, he is the only truth I know.'

1464. Anak: Itay, bibili ako ng band peper. Itay: Anak, huwag kang bobo ha? Hindi band peper ang tawag dun! Anak: Ano po ba? Itay: Kokongban.

1465. Someone has wisely said: “The heart is a fertile place…anything planted there will grow for sure… whether LOVE or HATRED” Good Morning!! =)

1466. Dear Ma'am/Sir, I hereby tender my irrevocable resignation as your employee, effective today. It has been a pleasant stay in your company, but owing to personal reasons I am compelled to move on. I would like to thank you and your good management for the wonderful experience accorded to me during my stay in your company. Yours truly, Inday. - Lufet ni Inday, in fairness!

1467. To boys from cupid: Never leave the girl that destiny picked for you. Truly, distance makes the heart grow fonder but too much will instead make you wander. Always make your presence felt for all she needs is emotional assurance. There is one girl who is meant to catch my arrow for you and nothing can change that, not time nor circumstance.

1468. Thought of the day: 'If you were born na panget, it's not your fault. Pero kapag namatay kang ganyan, kasalanan mo na yan!' - Vicky Belo.

1469. Don't spoil what you have by desiring what you don't have. Rather, remember that what you have now was once among the things you used to hope for.

1470. Because of a friend like you, I've laughed a little harder, cried a little less, smiled a bit more. Because of you, I've learned to appreciate life more, thanks for coming my way!

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text messages 1411-1440

1411. Life's pretty simple. When you're asking for apples and life hands you lemons, make lemonade. If you're on your way out and it starts to rain, at least you won't have to water the plants anymore. It's a matter of seeing things in perspective. The benefits may not be immediate nor obvious, but you have to know this for sure: God will never give you anything you can't handle.

1412. The Don'ts to Remember: Don't wait for time. Make it. Don't wait for love. Feel it. Don't wait for money. Earn it. Don't wait for the path. Hack it. Don't wait for opportunity. Create it. Don't go for less. Get the best. Don't compare. Be unique. Don't avoid failure. Use it. Don't dwell on mistakes. Learn from them. Don't back down. Go around. Don't close your eyes. Open your mind. Don't run from life. Embrace and enjoy it. Don't just read this. Share it!

1413. One day, a sadist, a masochist, a murderer, a necrophile, a zoophile and a pyromaniac were talking in a psychic ward... Sadist: I'm bored, why don't we torture a cat? Zoophile: Yeah, we'll torture it and then f*ck it! Murderer: We'll torture it, f*ck it and then kill it! Necrophile: We'll torture it, f*ck it, kill it and f*ck it again! Pyromaniac: Yeah! Then, we'll burn the cat! ... Sudden silence... Then, all asked the masochist, 'Why he didn't say anything?' Masochist: Meow!

1414. Do you know what makes me happy when you text me? Not your message, but your name that appears when it beeps. Because I miss the sender behind it.

1415. If you love someone, you say it right then out loud or the moment just passes you by. - My Bestfriend's Wedding

1416. Saan ka na? Magreply ka naman. Andito kami, naghihintay sa iyo sa may GMA Studio. May taping tayo ngayon sa commercial ng Safeguard. Bilisan mo, ikaw ang germs! hahaha!

1417. I believe that my trained skills and expertise in management with the use of standard tools, and my discipline and experience will contribute significantly to the value of work that you want. My creativity, productivity and work efficiency and the high quality of outcomes I can offer will boost the work progress. - Inday sa interview ng bago nyang amo.

1418. Umaga na naman, gising mga pasaway! Magtanggal ng muta at panis na laway. Humarap sa salamin at sabihin, 'Cute ko talaga.' Tiyak, ganda inyong umaga kahit kagigising mo pa lang ay nagsinungaling ka na! =)

1419. Life is unpredictable. You may not live long and miss out telling your friends that they're appreciated. So I'm telling you now that life won't be the same without you as one of my friends.

1420. Kapag nagtetext ako sa 'yo, ang gusto ko, napapangiti kita kahit sa simpleng pangungumusta, sa mga quotes na ipinapasa ko, gusto ko gumagaan yung loob mo, at nasasabi mo na... naalala na naman ako ni 'kukote' =)

1421. Boy: Pwede bang umakyat ng ligaw? Girl: Sorry, wala kaming stairs!

1422. Ang love, parang work. Mahirap pero masaya, maraming kakumpetensya, pero kinakaya. May dayoff at overtime, tapos, minsan, may bonus pa. Eh paano kung pagod ka na? Magreresign ka na lang ba??

1423. Three important stars in your life: 1. Party like a rock star. 2. Look like a movie star, and most importantly, 3. F*ck like a porn star! :D Awooo! Yeaba!

1424. The hardest part in walking away from the one you love is the part that you realize that they will never ever run after you.

1425. Inday, punta ka sa botika. Ibili mo si sir ng Viagra. Maid: Sa iyo ba gagamitin ni Sir? Misis: Bakit? Maid: Kasi, pag sa akin, Red Bull lang, pwede na!

1426. How to get the person you love? 1. Be friendly sa kanya. 2. Intindihin mo sya. 3. Mahalin mo lang sya hanggang magsawa ka. Kapag wala pa ring nangyari, lasingin mo! Talo-talo na! =)

1427. The awareness that two people are soulmates should be bilateral. If only one person believes it, it's called stalking. - Jessica Zafra.

1428. Nun complains about male nudity in the apartment accross hers. Police: But sister, from here, you only see him from the waist up and that's not a problem. Nun: Hello! Halika, tumayo ka sa ibabaw ng mesa! Ayun noh, kitang kita ko noh!

1429. Be thankful that you don't have everything you desire, if you did, what would there be to look forward to? Be thankful for the difficult times, it's during those times you grow. Be thankful for your limitations because they give you opportunities for improvement. Be thankful for your mistakes. They will teach you valuable lessons. Find a way to be thankful for your troubles and they can become your blessings.

1430. People say I'm strong because I'm numb to any pain. Actually, it's my special technique. What they don't know is that I had to break my heart a million times just to master it.

1431. Sexy girl nagkukumpisal. Priest: O iha, ano ang iyong ikukumpisal? Sexy: Father, kapag nakakarinig po ako ng lalakeng nagmumura, hindi ko mapigilan ang sarili kong yayain syang magsex. Priest: Put*ng ina, hindi nga?! =)

1432. Husband: Mahal, kung hindi ako makaligtas sa operasyong ito, ikaw na sana ang bahala sa mga bata. I love you all! Wife: Tumigil ka! Wala pang namatay sa tuli!

1433. Don't talk too much when you're mad, you might say things you don't mean to say.

1434. Somehow along the course of life, you learn about yourself and realize there should never be regrets, only a lifelong appreciation of the choices you've made.

1435. God gave us two gifts: one is choice, the other, chance. The choice of a good life and the chance to make it the best. God bless you with a lovely day!

1436. In the Lord's prayer, the word 'love' did not appear; 'forgive' was used. It's because forgiving is the highest expression of loving. Have a nice day!

1437. Not everything that can be counted counts and not everything that counts can be counted.

1438. Nang pumatong ako, gumalaw sya, hanggang sabay na kami. Una, dahan-dahan hanggang pabilis nang pabilis. Shit! Ang sarap sarap. Ikaw, gusto mo rin bang sumakay sa duyan? Hehe.

1439. A good person is never alone. One who sows thoughtfulness reaps friendship. One who plants kindness reaps love. Enjoy the fruits you've sown well. Good morning!

1440. Love changes you. The way you act, the way you think, the way you decide. Sometimes, you even go against your principles and beliefs in life. Loving doesn't always mean you'll be happy. But you will soon realize that it is better if the person you love would be happy with someone else, than lonely with you. That's what you call sacrifice.

continue reading text messages 1411-1440...

text messages 1381-1410

1381. Tom Cruise + Katie Holmes = 'Tomkat', Brad Pitt + Angelina Jolie = 'Brangelina', Ogie + Regine = Ogre! Hehehe. Shrek 3, now showing!

1382. An airplane crashed at a town in Batangas: Media: Manong, pakilarawan po ng nangyari. Manong: Ala eh, nakow, garne ga utoy. Kakaalmusal ko laang. Gayak ako'y sisinsay sa kahanggan, ay natan-awan ko yaan sa alapaap ay nasisilaban. Bago sumirok ng papagay-on na akala mo'y papatak. Ginagaling na laang at sa sukalang are sumugba, ay kung sa kabayanan ga, ay di panay mga utas! Media: Ano daw??

1383. Don't be afraid to take risks and experience pain to achieve your dreams. Always remember, if you want a rainbow, you must first go through the rain.

1384. When I lose someone I love, sobrang sakit. But it was then I realized, 'Ok lang mawala ang taong minsan kong minahal, huwag lang ang mga kaibigan ko na lagi kong karamay!'

1385. Another moon? Possible. Another sun? Possible? Another sky? Possible. Another you? Impossible! Because God can't make the same mistake twice. Hehehe.

1386. I cried because I don't have a shoe until I saw a man without a feet. Sometimes, we're just too blind to appreciate the things which surround us.

1387. I'm proud of myself because I was given a chance to meet someone like you. Whatever happens, I'll always treasure you because I know, I'll never have another friend like you.

1388. Bakit hindi lalake ang nanganganak? Eh paano mo nga naman palalabasin dun ang bata? Ano yun, parang toothpaste?

1389. ) Ginupit na kuko!

1390. Valer kuberch, kahit jutay, ang julamantrax donchi ay anek-anek. Nyongkamas at nutring, nyogarilyas at kipay, nyitaw, nyotaw, jutani. Kundol, jutola, jupot, jolabastrax, at mega join-join pa, jobanox nyustasa, nyubuyax, nyomatis, nyowang at luyax, and around the keme ay fullness ng linga! - Bahay Kubo, Gay version.

1391. I admit that I may not be the best friend for you, or even give you a perfect care. But there's only one thing I can promise... '214' - 2 be 1 of your friends 4ever.

1392. They say that if love becomes painful, it's time to let that love go and save yourself. Just keep this in mind, you'll be able to find another love, but not another self.

1393. Paano ba ang tamang pagbati sa umaga? Good morning! Luma na. Gud am! Maikli. Magandang umaga! Tagalog, baduy! Alam mo kung anong masarap pakinggan? Eh di, 'Hi, cute! Gising na!' =) Smile ha!

1394. Words of a student to live by: 'Whenever I feel like studying, I lie down until the feeling is gone.' Yeah!

1395. There will always be dreams grander or humbler than your own, but there will never be a dream exactly like your own, for you are unique and more wondrous than you know. Good night!

1396. Having someone to remember is pleasing enough to the heart. It doesn't matter if you remember me once in a while, what matters is we're friends at all times!

1397. I don't know why we all hang on to something we know we're better off letting go. It's like we're scared to lose what we don't even really have. Some of us say we rather have that something than absolutely nothing. But the truth is: to have it halfway is harder than not having it all.

1398. Boy-1: Tanungin mo ako ng English, sasagutin kita ng Spanish. Boy-2: What is more important, heart or mind? Boy-1: Spanish.

1399. Trials are like fire, it can destroy or strengthen you depending on your character and outlook in life. Remember, the fire that melts butter is the same fire that hardens steel.

1400. Isang kwento na tanging Batangueno laang ang makakaintindi. Dine sa tuklong ay may puno ng kape na arugang-aruga pa ng mamay. Siyang pinapugadan sa hantik na guyam at pinabantayan sa bilot. Naulutang ngatain ng mamay ang bubot na parang sinturis. Pasal na pasal. Nang bigla na laang nagpatikar, lumiban ng karsada kahit naambon, naglulupagi sa gabukan kaya puro libag, tubal na tubal, talipa ang sipit at gura. Napadpad ang mamay sa masukal na balinghuyan at doon naulutang gamitin ang kawot para garutihin ang bangkalang.

1401. This puzzle is exclusively for those who have a sharp mind. How many eggs will a rooster lay in 1 year if it lays 5 eggs a day? No reply, no IQ! Game? I'll wait...

1402. Kung isang oras na lang ang natitira sa buhay ko, at ikaw ang makakasama ko, saan mo ako dadalhin at ano ang gagawin mo para mapasaya mo ako sa isang oras na yun? Sagutin mo ha? Wait ko.

1403. Giving up doesn't mean you are weak. Instead, it proves that you are strong to let go of the things that are important to you. Love is not what makes you complete but it is when you learn to be unselfish.

1404. Not everyone may understand the way I am, some may hate me, while others will love me. For all of that, all I can say is thank you for whatever appreciation you have.

1405. Morning smile makes the day better. That’s the best thing we can do to make life happy. Good morning.

1406. Tatlong pari, nagsabihan ng sikreto. Pari1: Sa inyo ko lang ito sasabihin, may nabuntis akong parishioner. Pari2: Ako naman, bading, may boyfriend akong sakristan. Pari3: Ako naman, madaldal.

1407. Do you believe in soulmates? They say they are two people constantly in search for one another without them even knowing. Soulmates are meant to be together forever, that's why they continuously search for each other, against time and space. Lucky are those who actually cross paths, however, they just cross, but who said they could actually be together?

1408. Falling in love with you is the second best thing in the world... Finding you is the first!

1409. Love is complex, it can hurt, it can be great. But never ask anyone to define love because love was never meant to be explained, it is supposed to be felt.

1410. If you really love someone never let go, don't believe that letting go means that you love best, instead fight for your love, that's what true love is.

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text messages 1351-1380

1351. In the morning I do not eat because I think of you. At noon I do not eat because I think of you. In the evening I do not eat because I think of you, and at night I do not sleep because Im hungry.

1352. Amo: Inday, kunin mo nga yung Vogue magazine. Inday: Ma'am, Vogyu, hindi Vog. Amo: Inday, Vog ang tamang pagbigkas. Inday: O sige na nga Ma'am, Vog na, there's no need to arg!

1353. The law of the seed: Most seeds never grow. For 1 apple tree to bear 500 apples, you need 10 seeds. In life, this principle might mean you'll need to attend 20 interviews to get 1 job, talk to 50 people to sell 1 house, meet 1000 acquiantances to have 1 special person. If we really want to make things happen, we usually need to try more than once. That's the law of nature.

1354. In tough times, stay motivated by looking how far you have come rather than how far you have to go. Count your blessings, not what you are missing. God bless you!

1355. Sa isang school. Boy: Tapos ka na ba sa exam mo? Girl: Bakit naman? Boy: Wala lang. Para ako naman ang sagutin mo.

1356. One cannot question the existence of feelings. They are there, raw and undeniable, but one can choose not to nurture what is felt, yet no matter what they say, what has been felt will always be more honest than what was chosen. Hence, true realities are not built by the mind but by the heart.

1357. The good thing that you desire will become the best thing when you allow God to give it to you in His time. 'He has made everything in His time.' Ecc. 3:11. Good morning!

1358. 'God bless you' is such a little prayer but it means so much. It means may the Lord with His gracious hands give you more than you have prayed for. Good morning!

1359. Kapag iniwan ka ng mahal mo, huwag kang lumuha. Sa halip, magsaya ka at sabihin, simula ng iwan mo ako, 'My skin is firmer, my pores are smaller, and my lines, parang nawala!'

1360. Relationships are like traffic signs, 1-way, 2-way, do not enter, no U turn, no left turn. But the best so far is give way and keep right.

1361. IMPORTANT NOTE: If you don't send this text to at least 5 people in the next 30 seconds, a bird will crap on you today.

1362. We exist temporarily thru what we take, but we live forever thru what we give. It's better to give than to receive. So, paano? Gift ko na lang sa Pasko ha!

1363. SOmetimes, you need to experience everything so that you would learn. There's no easy way in living life, so live it as it is. Cry. Laugh. Be crazy. And don't miss the chances that life is giving you because the most important things are not things at all, most of the time, they are people making your life worth living.

1364. It can be cute when people who have a lot in common date each other. But isn't it more fun to date someone you can argue with? And then, in the end, agree to disagree then hold each other tight? I mean, really, why would you want to date yourself?

1365. Madaling magkasakit ang mga cute, ang mga crush ng bayan, ang ma-appeal at henyo, ang kind, thoughtful, smart, malakas ang karisma, ang... ang sama na ng pakiramdam ko.

1366. Anak: Ma, si kuya, nagbigti po sa banyo! Mama: Ha? Tumakbo patungong CR. Mama: Punyeta ka, huwag kang magbibiro ng ganyan! Anak: Hehehehe. Joke! Sa kwarto po sya nagbigti!

1367. Many complain of their looks, but none of their brains! - Yiddish proverb. Oo nga naman!

1368. Businessman explaining the reason for having two or more wives: 'Monopoly is always damaging while competitions improve service!'

1369. Higa kita sa kama. Tapos, huhubaran kita. Hahalikan kahit saan. Hahaplusin ko buong katawan mo! Tapos, tatanggalin ko ang Diaper mo. Baby, don't cry ha!

1370. Lani Misalucha : Asia's Nightingale. Regine Velasquez : Asia's Song Bird. Christian Bautista : Hearthrob of Asia. Gloria Macapagal Arroyo : Mole of Asia!

1371. Minsan, sa buhay natin, hindi maiiwasang mabasa ng ulan, maranasan ang bagyo. Pero sa mga pagkakataong ito, tandaan mo kaibigan, payong ang dalhin mo, huwag kapote. Ano ka, Grade 1?

1372. One of the biggest form of flattery is knowing that just by being your normal, wonderful self, you make some bitches extremely insecure. =)

1373. Umiyak ako kay God before. Tanong ko, 'Bakit po palagi akong nalalayo sa mga kaibigan ko?' Niyakap nya ako at sabi nya: 'Kasi anak, angel ka at aswang sila, magkaiba kayo ng level!'

1374. Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and in the end, it is only with yourself.

1375. Love is everything it's cracked up to be. That's why people are so cynical about it. It really is worth fighting for, risking everything for. And the trouble is, if you don't risk everything, you risk even more.

1376. Husband: Hindi ako makatulog, lagi kong naiisip ang utang ko kay pare na dalawang milyong piso. Wife: Tawagan mo si pare, sabihin mo, hindi ka makakabayad para sya naman ang hindi makatulog.

1377. Dear SOLDIER, I see that you’re tired. I tell you, drop your sword and put down your shield. Why worry about the fight? After all, it’s not your battle. It’s Mine. All you have to do is to be in the battle field. Then against the thousand who tried to destroy you, there I will stand and rescue you. Winning this war requires neither only Me nor only you. But rather, ME and YOU. Just do your best and I’ll take care of the rest. Your COMMANDER, JESUS.

1378. Kung ikaw ang magsisilbing kandila sa dilim, hindi kita sisindihan! Mas gugustuhin ko pang maglakad sa dilim at matinik kasama ka, kesa makarating ako sa liwanag pero wala ka na!

1379. Ang pag-aaral ang pinto ng tagumpay, pero ang pangongopya ang susi! Hehehe!

1380. Si Superman, man of steel, hindi ba? Hindi tinatablan ng bala at kutsilyo. Bumabaluktot ang mga karayom sa kanya. Eh eto ang tanong. Tuli na kaya sya? Eh paano sya tutuliin, aber??!!

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Text Messages 1321-1350

1321. When you receive this message, send it to: 3 that you think is amazing, 2 persons you secretly hate, 2 bestfriends, 3 that you think is stupid, 3 that you always think of, 1 crush, 4 that you want to get close with, 1 that you love, 1 you idolize, 2 persons that you can't forget and 1 you wish to kill. Now, keep guessing why I sent you this message. Bwahahaha!

1322. Bisaya teacher: Class, I want you to watch Sex Scenes! Class: What?! Teacher: What's wrong? It's beatipul pilm starring Bruce Welles. Class: Ahh! Sixth Sense!

1323. A child in the farm looks up, sees a plane fly overhead and dreams of a faraway place. A traveler in the plane looks down, sees the farm house and dreams of home. That's life, you'll never realize the value of a thing unless it moves away from you. So be happy and start enjoying what you have now.

1324. Man and wife out on African safari when suddenly, a lion sprang out of nowhere and dragged wife with its jaw. Wife: Shoot! Shoot! Husband: I can't! Wala na akong film!

1325. Para sa makulit, pero mabait. Para sa sabog, pero kalog. Para sa mapang-asar, pero thoughtful. Para sa maloko, pero cute. Para sa akin pala ito?! Pakisend nga ulit!

1326. May the Lord give you a fresh supply of strength to do your tasks, anoint your works, bless your plans so that even your smallest accomplishments will glorify God. Good morning!

1327. Pare, nag-away kami ng girlfriend ko. Bakit naman? She asks for a gift, sabi kahit ano daw, basta may diamond. Yun naman pala eh, anong niregalo mo? Baraha!

1328. Be a person full of love and life, stay simple yet happy. When things go wrong, don't go blue, just say, 'I will get thru.' And always remember, God loves you. Take care!

1329. Anak: Inay, nung nasa bus kami ni papa, sabi nya, bigay ko inuupuan ko sa dalagang sumakay. Inay: Tama yun anak. Anak: Pero inay, nakakandong lang ako kay papa nun!

1330. When you love, it's not for you to be understood but for you to understand. Not for you to take but for you to be taken. To listen, not to dictate. To sacrifice and not to demand. Not to count or measure but to love.

1331. Mom and girl are watching a movie. Suddenly, there's a love scene. Girl: Mom, what are they doing? Mom: Oh, they're baking. Girl: Ok. Then in the morning. Girl: Mom, I know you and dad are baking last night! Mom: How did you know? Girl: I tasted the frosting on the couch! Eeeoowww!

1332. People like you are found only once in a lifetime. I want to be sure that I'm not going to spend that lifetime looking for another you! I'm happy I met you!

1333. It takes a thousand workers to build a castle and a million soldiers to protect a country, but just one woman to make a happy home. Let's thank the maid!

1334. Question: What is the new definition of old age? Answer: It is when you see someone sexy and the only thing it arouses is your memory!

1335. Life is like the sea; now troubled, later calm. But even how big the waves are, or how high the tide is, always remember: Tide is miracle! Di gyud ilisan. Ilisan pang bana!

1336. It is not destiny that determines love, it is choice. Our so-called destiny is a lie. Relationships last long not because they're destined to last long. Relationships last long because two brave people made a choice - to keep it, to fight for it, and to work for it. Meanwhile, other relationships fail not because they're destined to fail. They failed because one of the two, or both, made the choice - to set each other free.

1337. Three things in life when gone never come back: time, words and opportunity. Three things in life that should never be lost: peace, hope and honesty. Three things in life that are most valuable: love, faith and prayer. Three things in life that are never certain: dreams, success and fortune. Three things in life that make a person: hardwork, sincerity and commitment. Three things in life that can destroy a person: lust, pride and anger. Three things that are truly constant: change, death and God. Good evening!

1338. Sometimes we think we have so little and always wanting But if we start to appreciate the little things in life, we will find out that we have so much. So much of family and friends, so much of love and so much of God in our hearts.

1339. Boy: Can I touch your software? Girl: Show me first your hardware. Boy: Can I install it in your system? Girl: Ok, if you cover it with anti-virus first. =)

1340. Guy1: Alam mo, last month, isinama ko ang girlfriend ko sa bahay ng lolo kong milyonaryo. Guy2: Oh, bakit malungkot ka? Anong nangyari? Guy1: Ayun, lola ko na sya ngayon!

1341. Man: Doctor, bakit dinugo sa first night ang asawa ko e dating GRO yan. (Ineksamin ng doktor ang misis) Doc: Wala po kayong dapat ikabahala, natuklap lang po ang kalyo!

1342. A salesman stopped at a farmhouse for the night. Farmer: Sorry, we don't have vacant room, but I can let you sleep with my daughter if you promise not to bother her. (Salesman agreed.) He went inside the dark room, undressed and slept into bed. He felt the farmer's daughter at his side. Next morning, he asked for his bill. Farmer: 50 pesos only because you shared the bed. Salesman (paid the bill and said): Your daughter was very cold. Farmer: Yes, I know, we are going to bury her today.

1343. Sometimes, two people decide to be just friends even if they still love each other and I often wonder why? I suppose it's not the love that's so hard to sustain, but the commitment that complicates everything.

1344. The best feeling in the world is realizing you're perfectly happy without the thing you thought you needed. Have a nice day ahead!

1345. Reports have it that Congress intends to ammend the Bible after they are done with the Constitution. I think they intend to abolish Hell before their terms here on earth expire.

1346. Minsan, nakakapagod maghabol at makipaglaro ng taguan sa taong mahal mo. Pero alam mo, mas nakakapagod at mas mahirap magtaguan lalo pa kung ikaw ang taya sa Mall of Asia! =)

1347. The most interesting thing about heart transplants is that one completely loses his own heart and be replaced with someone else's yet still has the feelings for the same person he/she loves. This proves that love works in the minds of people and not in their hearts. Bottomline is, love is a state of mind. You'll learn how to forget only if you try doing so. - Dr. Burke, Grey's Anatomy.

1348. Ang kaibigan, parang movie! May action, may comedy, may drama, may horror at may love story! Pero kung ikaw ang bida, ahh, alam ko yan. Sure ako, scandal yan! hehehe.

1349. Teacher: Who can give an example of a tag question? Pupil: My teacher is beautiful, isn't she? Teacher: Good! Itagalog mo nga! Pupil: Si ma'am ay maganda, hindi naman, di ba?!

1350. When life gets you down and you feel weary, draw inspiration and strengths from these words of the great poet and philosopher, Chito Miranda: 'Tama na yan, inuman na! Hoy pare ko, tumagay ka! Nanlalamig ang lalamunan, naghihintay, nag-aabang!' =)

continue reading Text Messages 1321-1350...

Text Messages 1291-1320

1291. I know friendship is hard to keep but even if it gets harder, I wouldn't give up because even if it's hard to keep you, it will be a million times harder to find you again!

1292. All truth is good, but not all truth is good to say.

1293. Life is like the game of chess, one wrong move and your game is all messed up!

1294. What she says versus what she means... Says: Hindi ako galit. Means: Hayop ka! Says: Wait, 5 minutes na lang. Means: I'll be ready in 1 hour. Says: May suggestion ako. Means: Ito ang dapat! Says: Ang pangit ko ngayon no? Means: Sabihin mong maganda ako!

1295. What is LOVE? Some say it could conquer the world. Others say you will lose yourself, completely blind. But have you ever wondered what's behind those letters L.O.V.E.? I would say, it's a reminder. There's an L because man could not live without Love, there's an O for you wouldn't be able to spell your w_rld without it, there's V since you make yourself Vulnerable to things that they call moments, and E, to tell us the reason of our Existence.

1296. Take some time to smile when you're sad, to rest when you're tired, to love if you're feeling empty and to let go if you need to. Time endures, time heals. In this life, just take some time for yourself.

1297. Before a new chapter begins, the old one has to end. Tell yourself that what has passed will never come back. Remember that there was a time when you could live without that thing or that person - nothing is irreplaceable, a habit is not a need... Closing cycles, not because of pride, incapacity or arrogance but simply because that no longer fits your life. Stop being who you were, and change into who you are. - Paulo Coehlo on Pragmatism

1298. A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable but more useful than a life spent doing nothing.

1299. The greatest revenge to a girl who steals your man is to let her have him, because a truly good man can never be stolen, right?

1300. An old couple saw an X-rated movie for the first time. In the middle of the movie, biglang tumayo si lola. Sinampal si lolo! Pak! 'Damuho ka! Tumanda na tayo, pwede palang kainin yun!'

1301. It's nice to wake up, and sleep again, di ba?! Good morning!! =)

1302. The secret of life is happiness. The secret of happiness is love. The secret of love is sacrifice. The secret of sacrifice is to obey your wife.

1303. Sa libro ng buhay, bawat kwento ay mahalaga. Bawat buklat, merong kakaiba. Pero alam mo ba kung anong pahina ang bumuo ng aking istorya? Yung kwento kung saan nakilala kita. ;)

1304. In my life, there are many problems I face. Sometimes too hard for me to handle and sometimes, I easily give up. Do you know what keeps my heart fighting? A piece of my life called friends!

1305. FYI: An average American man measures 5'9'. Pinoy average height is 5'4'. Humans are a little taller at night (quarter of an inch). Average size of American penis is 6 inches. Average Pinoy penis is 4 inches. Typical guy laughs 15x a day, cries 1.5x a month. An average guy sleeps 7.5 hours a night, 220000 hours sleep in his lifetime. A typical American guy has 14.5 sex partners in his life (excluding sex workers) Men enjoy sex 135x a year. Men can read small prints than women but has weaker location memory. 91% of men lie regularly.

1306. Take 60 seconds and pass this on to those you want God to bless, and don't forget to send it back to the one who asked God to bless you first. Father, God, bless all my friends and family in whatever it is that You know they may be needing this day. May their life be full of Your peace, prosperity and power as he/she seeks to have a closer relationship with You. Amen.

1307. Love can never be wrong, sometimes, you blame the situation or even the person. But no matter who you blame, if it really wasn't the will of God, it just wouldn't be.

1308. I can never say how my life would go and how long I'd stay alive. All I know is that even we're miles apart, you'd always be one of the sweetest piece of puzzle completing my life.

1309. If you're not sure where you stand in someone's life, it's best to leave things behind so that if they drop you off, it will be easier to forget them. Don't waste time waiting for nothing when efforts are not recognized. It's best to just give things up. You've done your part, let them do theirs.

1310. To handle yourself, use your head. To handle others, use your heart.

1311. Blessed is the person who understands that the reason for praying is not to have what we want but to accept what God has given us. Good evening!

1312. In life, you are given certain chances, you have to make certain choices. A choice that may change your life. If given a chance, would you rather be wrong but happy? Or right but sad?

1313. May the arm of your angel hold you tight each day. May she light and guide you all the way. But if ever your angel is busy today, just tell me, ako ang magdu-duty. :)

1314. Ako lang ang makakapagpadugo ng ilong ni Manny Pacquiao! - English.

1315. It's a mistery why people still fall in love after a heartbreak and risk getting rejected and hurt all over again. I guess it's the dream of finding true love or simply because life is happier when you're in love.

1316. God has 5 gifts for you today: A key for every problem, a light for every shadow, a plan for every tomorrow, a joy for every sorrow and a new day full of blessings! Good day!

1317. You can close your eyes with the things you don't wanna see but you can never close your heart with the things you don't wanna feel.

1318. The easiest part was getting to know you. The hardest part was being away from you. The best part is when we're together.

1319. Wife: Honey, kapag hawak ko ang bote ng softdrinks na ito, naaalala ko ang ex-boyfriend ko. Husband: Eh ako, kelan mo ako naaalala? Wife: Kapag subo ko na ang straw.

1320. Walk this day with great confidence in your heart, for you have much to offer. A lot of people await the goodness and love that you carry within. Good morning and God bless!

continue reading Text Messages 1291-1320...

Text Messages 1261-1290

1261. Tinkerbell speaks: They say that when you leave Neverland, you'd grow up and you'd meet different people who'd try and make you believe. Sometimes, you'd choose the prince. He'd take you to his castle, dance with you, but would allow you to leave when the clock strikes 12. Sometimes, you'd meet Spiderman, he'd give you the sweetest kiss and vanishes for all time. Sometimes, you'd find your Peter Pan, a guy who'd take care of you, and fly with you against the winds but then you'd notice that his heart still belongs to Wendy. So, I'll be like Princess Fiona. I'll find my Shrek, not perfect, but real and stays forever.

1262. Do you know what Christmas is? It's simple. Christ Has Risen In Spite The Most Adverse Sacrifices. Please pass to all your friends and spread the good news!

1263. Kaya ko din magpapayat. Wala lang ako sa mood.

1264. 1986 was a year of revolutions. It was the year when our people kicked out a dictatorship that stifled our freedom. It was the year the first lady president stepped into power. And it was the year when the Filipino people heard the powerful voice of Regine Velasquez!

1265. I know your life can go on without me, that you can be happy without me, that you can survive without me. But even if you turn me away, I will still stay with you and will always be your friend.

1266. You are the one person in this world that I would never trade with anyone else. You've given me memories so unique in you and what else?! Guess they'll never understand unless they get the chance to get to know you.

1267. Before, choices were always easy. I never had to choose between things that I liked and I liked more. But now, no matter which one I pick, it seems to be wrong and I always end up losing what I really wanted.

1268. Kapag sinaktan at ipinagpalit ka ng mahal mo at inimbitahan ka pa sa kasal nila, pumunta ka, hawakan mo ang kamay nya at ibulong mo, 'Sukob ang kasal mo!'

1269. Mahirap talagang lumimot ng taong ayaw mong kalimutan, mahirap saktan ang taong ayaw mong masaktan, mahirap maniwala sa ayaw mong paniwalaan, pero ang pinakamahirap sa lahat ay tinidorin ang sabaw!

1270. Everything that happened once may never happen again. But everything that happens twice will sure happen the third time. - Arab Proverb. Think about it.

1271. Boy: Uy, ang ganda ng ipin mo ha, parang exams. Tony: Huh? Baket naman? Boy: One seat apart!

1272. Enemies stab you in front, bitches stab you at the back. Jerks stab you at the heart but a true friend is sitting there with a knife, to stab those a*sholes right back!

1273. Man: Ne, anong pangalan mo? GRO: Paquita po! Man: Aba, antigo na yang pangalan mo. Bihira na ang may ganyang pangalan. Sino yung mga kasama mo? GRO: Yung nakaputi, si Pahipo. Yung nakapula, si Pahiga, at yung nakastripe, si Patuwad.

1274. A real friend not only goes out with you anywhere you go but also remembers you no matter how busy they are, who takes their time to say, 'Hi Friend'

1275. Sabi nila, ang panget daw, itinadhana para sa maganda at gwapo. Napaupo ako sa isang tabi... Badtrip! Ibig sabihin, para sa pangit ako?!

1276. Don't wait until it's too late to tell someone how much you love, how much you care. Because when they're gone, no matter how loud you shout and cry, they won't hear you anymore.

1277. Isang mabangis na pambanat! Guy: Miss, freezer ka ba? Girl: Bakit mo naman nasabi? Guy: Tinitigasan kasi ako sa iyo eh! Hehehe.

1278. Whenever you make me smile, I never miss to put it somewhere in my heart and if ever I find myself lonely, I would scan my heart to remind me of the times I felt important because of you. Take care!

1279. Want to hear a fairy tale? Once upon a time, Cinderella was so horny. So, she put Pinnochio's nose between her legs and shouted, 'Magsinungaling ka, bilis!' Hehehe.

1280. Use your lips for truth, your voice for kindness, your eyes for compassion, your hands for charity, your figure for uprightness, your heart for love and for anyone who doesn't like you, your middle finger! Hahaha!

1281. Masarap magmahal kung ikaw lang ang mahal nya. Masarap magmahal kung talagang seryoso sya. Pero wala nang mas sasarap pa kung sasabihin nya, 'Alam mo, kuntento na ko sayo...'

1282. Girlfriend: Mahal, ihatid mo ako. Boyfriend: Hindi pwede babe. Wala akong pera. Naoperahan ang lola ko, may sakit ang kapatid ko. Wala pang ipinapadala si mommy galing Japan. Girlfriend: Ayaw mo? Hindi ka makakascore sa akin, tandaan mo yan! Boyfriend: Ahahaha! Aba'y tingnan mo nga naman. May naipit pala na P500 sa bulsa ko! Tara babe, taxi tayo!

1283. It is better to die for something than to live for nothing.

1284. Alone? I'll be your shadow. Afraid? Stay behind me. Wanna cry? Here's my shoulder. Need a hug? I'll embrace you tightly and say, 'Whatever happens, you have me.'

1285. If I could freeze time, I'd freeze the moment we were together. There was so much I wanted to share, I wanted to say, but the one thing I wasn't able to tell was how much I wanted to stay.

1286. In life, there are four things you can't get back. The stone, after the throw. The word, after it is said. The action, after it is done, and the time, after it has passed. So be careful of what you throw, of what you speak, of what you do and of what you let pass by. Take care!

1287. Garfield's words of wisdom: 'We all get heavier as we get older because there's a lot more info in our heads. So, I'm not fat! I'm just really intelligent and my head couldn't hold anymore so it started filling up the rest of me.'

1288. Boy: I saw her. Still pretty and she looks so happy. Girl: I saw him. I felt like crying but I won't let him notice that. Boy: I wonder if she's now taken, maybe, she is. Girl: I'm still single, can't seem to find someone who could take his place. Boy: I know she's angry. Girl: After all he's done, I couldn't get angry. Boy: I'm coward not to choose her. Girl: He was brave enough to choose the one he truly loves. Boy: I regret it. Girl: Wish he never left. Boy: I love her but it's too late, she doesn't love me anymore. Girl: I love him still but I should move on. =(

1289. You are part of the puzzle of someone else's life. You may never know where you fit, but others will fill the holes in their lives with pieces of you. So if you run out of reasons to live, remember that someone else's life may never be complete without you in it.

1290. Define love. According to the nurses and intelligent people, love is a sickness. Because everybody who gets it ends up in bed!

continue reading Text Messages 1261-1290...