Friday, November 14, 2008

Text Messages 991-1020

991. May mga taong hindi mo maintindihan. Akala mo, makulit, mabait pala. Akala mo, wala lang, caring pala. Akala mo rude, sweet pala. Mukhang ikaw, no? Pero ako pala. Hehehe.

992. Minsan, sa buhay ko, nagmahal ako at niloko. Ngayon, bumabalik sya. Well, akala nya, mahal ko pa sya?! Marunong din akong maglaro noh! Leche sya. Ako ang hinamon nya? Pagsabay-sabayin ko pa sila.

993. Elementary life: Todo aral, no syota, puro laro. High School life: Konting aral, patagong syota, bawas laro. College life: Walang aral, sabay-sabay syota, iba na ang laro.

994. A special kaibigan is hard to hanap, hirap to lose and impossible to limot. True friends are never hiwalay, maybe I'm layo, but in puso, hindi kita forget, pangako! :)

995. Sexy: Doc, paano ko malalaman na sex maniac nga ako? Doctor: Meron tayong gagawing mga test, iha, pero bago ang lahat, bitiwan mo muna ang itlog ko, please!

996. 'Tepung terigu, kepingan coklat gula minyak nabati, bubuk coklat garam pengembang lemak jenuh berdasarkan.' - Huwag kang mag-alala, hindi sumpa yan, sangkap lang ng Chips Ahoy galing Malaysia. :)

997. It's better to love in just one minute and treasure it for a lifetime than to love for a lifetime and hate it every minute of your life. Happy Valentine's Day!

998. A relationship between two persons is like a house. When a light bulb burns out, you do not go and buy a new house. You fix the light bulb!

999. Umiiyak ang isang zoo worker, itinanong ko kung bakit. Sagot nya, 'Namatay kasi ang elepante.' 'Mahal na mahal mo yung elepante?''Hindi naman po, ako lang ang nautusang maghukay ng libingan nya!'

1000. The path you walk in life is unique, no one walks the road better than yourself for you alone rule your own destiny, so continue doing your best and stay happy.

1001. Guro: Anong meron sa Pangasinan? Jinggoy: Hundred Islands! Guro: Sa Albay? Bong: Bulkang Mayon! Guro: Eh sa Banaue? Lito Lapid: Uhm, Kwan po ma'am, car accessories! =)

1002. Noong isang gabi, sumakay ako sa dyip. Nagtataka ako kung bakit lahat sila, nakatingin sa akin. Ayaw nilang kumibo. Nakatitig lang sila sa akin. May isang naglakas ng loob at sinabi: 'Iho, inarkila namin ito!'

1003. Character is made by what you stand for; reputation by what you fall for. - Robert Quillen.

1004. Friendship has no vows, no rituals, it only needs people who are willing enough to care and make friendship a lifetime promise. I hope we will.

1005. Bakit ba binabase ang buhay sa horoscope, hula at bahala? Nakalimutan mo yata na pwedeng baguhin ang nakatakda at itinadhana. Sa Red Horse ka maniwala dahil ito ang tama!

1006. It could take a thousand workers to build a castle, a million soldiers to protect its country, but it only takes one man to build a happy home.

1007. Cute face catches the eyes, but good personality catches the heart. You are blessed because you have them both! Oh, huwag dibdibin! Sa akin ipinadala yan, pinabasa ko lang sa yo.

1008. Bakla: Papa, finger mo naman ako sa pwet. Bf: Ok! Bakla: Deeper, papa! Bf: Uhm! (inserts whole hand and pulls out a Rolex) Ano ito?! Bakla: Surprise! Happy birthday!

1009. Isang lalaki ang na-admit sa St. Luke's, sunog ang dalawang hita. Doctor: Nurse, idextrose mo, tapos antibiotic, burn cream at Viagra every 4 hours. Nurse: Viagra doc? Doctor: Para hindi sumayad yung kumot sa sugat. =)

1010. Beauty pageant. Judge: What if you found out your boyfriend has AIDS, what will you do? Contestant: I'll still love him. (Everybody claps).. Because AIDS doesn't matter! Hirit pa kasi eh.

1011. Marie: I've got to get birth control pills. I can't afford to get pregnant! Susan: I thought your husband had a vasectomy. Marie: That's why I must not get pregnant!

1012. He came to me one night... explored my body... licked, sucked, swallowed and had his fill... when satisfied he left... I was hurt... damn mosquito!

1013. Do you have the looks? Do you have the charm? Let us see if you have what it takes to be the first Mr. and Ms. Undas 2006. Sali ka na, dali!

1014. Lito Lapid: Why did you write me such a long speech? The people were bored. Secretary: Sir, I gave you a 20-minute speech, plus the two duplicate copies you wanted.

1015. Pretending you don't feel anything for someone is like convincing yourself that you could probably deny the only thing you can be sure of.

1016. Bakit daw ang utak nasa ulo at ang puso ay nasa dibdib? Simple lang, pangit kasing tingnan kapag inlove ka eh tumitibok ang noo mo at ang laswa naman na kapag nag-iisip ka eh hinihimas mo ang dede mo! Ano kaya yun? Ampanget!

1017. What is love? Those who don't like it call it responsibility. Those who play with it call it a game. Those who don't have it call it a dream. And those who understand it call it life.

1018. It's not wrong to give it all when you love. It's not wrong to love a person so much. Sometimes, the only wrong thing is the person we love.

1019. Q: May 10 inggitera, nagpakamatay ang isa, ilan ang natira? A: Eh di wala, kasi lahat nainggit, gumaya tuloy!

1020. Hearts are easily torn but can also be sewn together by someone who cares. Though the scars won't fade, the stitches will always be there to remind you that someone loves you enough to keep you whole again.

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